Confidence For Young Women

confidence |ˈkɒnfɪd(ə)ns |

noun
  1. the feeling or belief that one can have faith in or rely on someone or something.
  • the state of feeling certain about the truth of something.
  • a feeling of self-assurance arising from an appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.

Think about it for a second – who portrays your perfect picture of ‘confidence’? What is it about them that makes them confident? It’s likely that said person has a couple of traits, if you may, that make her seem confident. This person radiates happiness and positivity. But allow me to let you in on a secret – these people that are seen as confident, they’re not always 100% confident, they have their bad days too. Some days worse than the others. What’s different about them though, is their mindset.

If you come to see it, most young women and girls – no matter what race, religion, or culture – lack confidence, some a lot more than others. It is not uncommon for them to feel the need to seek validation from other people or to want to be like someone else just to fit in. If you ask me, it’s rather sad actually, seeing all these amazing, wonderful girls busying their lives with self-doubt or what not. I say life is too short to worry about what others think, it’s time to start loving yourself.

As someone who has dealt with self-esteem and confidence issues in the past, I can tell you it isn’t easy. But once you learn to put yourself first, oh you can’t imagine how happy you’ll be. Learning to build your confidence and to love yourself can be a very challenging task, but it’s one of the most important things that one can do. Confidence is like a muscle; the more you use it, the more it grows. It is a skill you can learn. Master it and wear it out on your sleeve for the world to see. I’m going to fill you in on how I built my own self-confidence growing up. Here are the most important steps to help you head in the right direction on your journey of self-growth.

ONE – FOCUS ON THE PRESENT

A lot of us allow ourselves to be held back by our pasts, and this can be very damaging, to say the least. Honestly, what do you get by dwelling on the past? You’re just throwing away the present, literally wasting time by doing so. Accept it and make peace with it, and learn to live in the ‘now’.  I spent years of my life lingering over the past. It brought way more harm than it did well, but again, what’s happened has happened and I’ve accepted that. Allow yourself to grow, to learn from your past, don’t let it hold you back from living in the present.

TWO – TEACH YOURSELF TO SMILE

Believe it or not, I never ever used to smile. I was extremely self-conscious, I also just didn’t know how to smile. I didn’t know how to be happy. Sounds odd, but it’s true. Teach yourself to smile more often, all the time. Smile to strangers or to yourself in the mirror. Smiling has this effect, it just automatically lifts your mood and confidence and keeps you from having a bad day. This will automatically bring about happiness, and it’ll leave you feeling great (even if you’ve had a not-so-great day).

THREE – WRITE DOWN YOUR ACHIEVEMENTS

Acknowledge your achievements – no matter how big or small, list out your strengths, write them all down and be proud of yourself because YOU did that. All by yourself. That deserves a little celebration and self-acknowledgment. Think about where you were a week, a month, or even a whole year ago. With self-doubt, it’s easy to ignore your accomplishments and everything positive. Quit beating yourself up, you’re so much better than that. Look how far you’ve come, despite everything.

FOUR – STOP COMPARING

Please. Stop. Comparing. Yourself. To. Other. People. This is one of the worst things to do by far and can be very toxic. Everyone is unique and so so different, so special in their own way. You can never be another person, but you can strive to be the best version of yourself. Someone will always seem prettier, smarter, or whatever else, but they will never be you. Stop comparing yourself to anyone else, you’ll feel and come off as extremely beautiful, just like you are.

FIVE – DON’T BE AFRAID TO FAIL

You can’t always expect life to be all colorful and peachy; failure and setbacks are inevitable. It’s part of the process, part of success. Don’t let the fear of failure hold you back. Instead, accept it and learn from it, and allow yourself to grow. This is all part of creating a great life. Accept the fact that life brings us both highs and lows, and understand that failure is the stepping stone to success. You cannot let failure define you, let it teach you instead. Say goodbye to that self-doubt that’s resting in your head, toss it away. It’s unwelcome. Don’t let it kill your dreams.

“The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.” -Elbert Hubbard

SIX – BE GENTLE TOWARDS YOURSELF

Treat yourself with kindness, love, and patience, like you would a child. You wouldn’t be rude to a child if they’ve made a mistake or if they’re upset about something silly, and you would acknowledge their dreams no matter how big and weird they may seem. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone gets upset and has bad days, everyone has passions and dreams. Don’t be harsh on yourself, no matter the circumstances. Love yourself. Always put yourself and your health first.

Confidence and self-growth is a very vast topic, and I have so much to talk about regarding the matter. For now, however, this should be enough. Self-confidence is a superpower – once you start believing in yourself, the magic will happen. It’s all a mind game. Change your mindset and you will change your life for the better, I promise you this.

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How To Live Your Best Life in 2018

Hi lovelies! So 2018 has finally rolled around, how are we all feeling about it? I’m honestly excited for this year, I can’t wait to see what new adventures it has in store. Every year, I see the “new year, new me” motto, but a few weeks into the new year almost everyone seems to have given up or to be having a bad/rough start to the year. This year though, that doesn’t have to be you or me. I’m going to tell you how to skip out on that rough start. It’s all about your mindsets, people, and the goals you set.

Here’s how to make 2018 your best year yet.

1. Reflect on 2017

The first thing you should be doing is reflecting on your year. Self-reflection or year-end reflection is very very important if you want to enter 2018 on the right foot. Think about where you were on January 1st of 2017, and really accept everything that has happened throughout the year – both the good and the bad. It’s only once you’ve come to terms with 2017 that you can enter the new year with a clear mind.

2. Invest in Your Body and Skin

This will be the year you get on track with your skin and body and put your needs first. With everyday stress, it’s so common that we let go of taking care of ourselves, but it’s time to fix that.

3. Prioritize Sleep

I cannot stress this enough, make sleep a priority. Yes, most of us have very busy schedules, but find any way to prioritize sleep to make sure you get no less than 7 hours at the minimum. Whether you have to incorporate naps into your schedule, sleep earlier, or wake up later, make it happen.

4. Focus on Hydration

If you’ve heard that water is the key to almost everything, believe it. Proper hydration can result in so many wondrous things happening for your body, skin, and health – you wouldn’t want to miss out on that.

5. Set Realistic Goals + Resolutions

With everyone setting new year’s resolutions, it’s not uncommon for most of us to get ahead of ourselves by setting unrealistic goals. It’s something I do very often myself. This year set proper goals for yourself, and keep them private. A study shows that people are more likely to achieve their goals if kept private, and I can back this one up.

6. Set A Priority List

While you have your list of goals, it’s even more important to have a priority list in order to stay grounded, and have an idea of what’s more important, while working towards said goals. Don’t lose sight of what you have right now in the process of chasing what’s still far away.

7. Find Healthy Alternatives to Cravings

Now, as a fitness junkie, I’m telling you guys – this will change your life. For some people it might not be easy in the beginning, but your body, skin, and mind will thank you later on. Also, your cravings might just indicate that you’re more dehydrated than you are hungry.

8. Workout

If you don’t already, you should start now. Working out holds a tonne of health benefits, and this too will lead you to the path to living your best life. Try it for at least 30 minutes a day, 6 days a week, for 30 days and see the difference.

9. Unplug Often

Unplug everyday for at least an hour. Spend some time alone or with those you love, and even though it’s the slightest difference, it’ll change your life for the better.

10. Practice Mindfulness + Meditate

Practice mindfulness wherever you are, whatever time of day it is. And what better way to de-stress after a long day than to meditate Meditating calms you internally, and if done before sleeping, you’ll have the best sleep ever. Trust me on that one.

11. Be Positive and Quit Complaining

No matter how positive you are or try to be, complaining ruins everything. Again, trust me on this. Both go hand in hand, positivity and no complaining. Yes, sometimes it can be really really hard to stay positive, but you have to try. Stop worrying about things, “What worries you masters you”.

12. Set A ‘De-Stressing’ Routine

Figure out your best way to de-stress, make a plan and stick to it.

13. Journal

Try journaling once every day. Writing out your thoughts, goals, feelings, or whatever else can help eliminate stress and can actually have positive benefits.

14. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Don’t be afraid to get out of your comfort zone and try new things. It’s the only way you’ll learn new things and make this a memory-filled year.

15. Practice Single Tasking

All of us are prone to multitasking and taking too much on our heads, and it just leads to us being stressed and overwhelmed. Why do that to ourselves? It’s a very unhealthy habit that has to be cut out at one point. Practice single-tasking, and write everything down in a to-do list, so it’s easier to handle one task at a time.

The overall idea is to focus on personal development, focus on growing and bettering yourself as a person. By implementing these habits into your everyday life, you’ll soon be on your way to having your best year yet.

Let me know what you think!

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